We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
Is tonight a drink a little and reminisce kinda night, or a drink everything and pray kinda night?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
OPIZZABONMYDICK
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
"I made out with someone too, but then he tried to fuck and I played dead"
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
