This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
She was blacked out on the couch MASTURBATING and whispering to her boyfriend...who wasn't there. I yelled her name and she didn't even pause.
The cop told you he couldn't let you pee. You just pulled your pants down and squared anyway and im surprised you didnt get arrested.No more drinking for you.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
Randomize
