8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
BECKY! ITS ANDY FROM LAST NIGHT WITH THE PILL
Andy, Sorry you have the wrong number. But good luck with Becky!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
I'm done being drunk I wish I could snap my fingers and be sober
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
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