All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
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and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
If you take a couple more shots you won't even know he's a mormon that drives a mini van.
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I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
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