I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything was going great until my fake mustache fell off when we started making out.
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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