Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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