so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Don't make me do math I'm drunk and full of chicken
Randomize
