problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize
