im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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