he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Randomize
