Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I had an awesome dream where you were a stegosaurus and I was a triceratops and we were hiding from a t-rex and had mad dino sex
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize