i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
FML I accidentally sent the text about his bruised balls as a group text that included his brother and my boss.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
