I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
Whoever decided putting Tom Seizmore and Heidi Fleiss together in rehab should win some kind of award.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
He asked the clerk if they sell a penis-shaped brander.
The doctor told me if I woke up with a broken foot and don't know how it happened, I might want to look into getting treatment.
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
