So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
