i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Fuck my life... Im so horny Im gonna take it out on this sandwich
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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