I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you know you've been in a long relationship when u start retiring sex toys
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
It's Valentine's Day, I figure for sure we'll have sex today, right? Wrong. I tried unsuccessfully for like an hour to get him to fuck me. Now he's asleep and I'm on my way to join the public library.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
Randomize
