do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
oh and apparently my boobs are named "have no fear" and "plenty o'beer"
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Randomize
