You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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