My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
This is my gift to your gina
there's a giant awkward home-wrecking elephant in the room. and its name is meg.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
Randomize
