I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
We proceeded to buy tattoos from the dollar store and interpretive dance to of monsters and men, it's safe to say he's my new fuck buddy
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize