So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
These 23 People Had Crazy Sex With Complete Strangers
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
23 Medical Examiners Reveal The Most Disturbing Causes Of Death They’ve Seen
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders