I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior, Kendra's boobs?
Not gonna lie: had to look up how to spell fellatio. Not sure I spelled it right even now. Looks like a Shakespearean character. ENTER FELLATIO, SOLILOQUIZING.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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