i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
what the fuck happened to the tacos
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