i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
