On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
dont touch anything in my room. If its phallus shaped, i can almost guarantee its been in my vagina.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
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She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
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