I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
you came home covered in oatmeal wearing a tutu holding a stolen wrotting pumpkin and "its a girl" balloons tied around your neck.you were whispering the lyrics to aaron carters 'aarons party'. i think the real question was what DIDNT you drink last night
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick