If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
Swear. I think after passing out in a community college parking lot I can safely nominate myself for the piece of shit of the year award
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice