That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I slapped a guy during sex last night because he moaned the wrong name. Then I remembered I gave him a fake name. Sorry bro.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
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