i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As shirtless as possible
Yepp, I had to be the one to explain that the girl who was slapping people in the face with a dildo was my drunk girlfriend.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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