I am spending my child support on dildos
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Randomize
