At least make sure they are 18
Why
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Muscle is literally tearing itself off of my shins. No I am not going on another bar crawl with you.
I'll pay?
Pick me up at 9.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
Enjoy your early 30’s! You’re still young enough to catch a twenty something that can fuck 4 times a day, hot enough to date forty year old penises that can last long enough to give you multiple orgasms
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