wanna go halves on a baby?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
I said you have to fuck the german guy and take one for the team...it's a once in a lifetime opportunity you know.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
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