i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize