So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize