Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
It's 10am, I'm at grocery store buying booze b/c the bf just told me that he didn't "technically" break up with his ex.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
I'm just gonna start letting dudes eat it. American idol for my vagina
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
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