Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
this morning i realized i came home with more condoms then i left. burn.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
My mom just asked if I've gotten any girls pregnant how is your day going
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
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