I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
I could only remember yelling "rip it down" as he ninja jumped off the bed, kicked the wall, and superman punched the fire alarm off the ceiling.
I've always wondered why you never put the hotel room in your name...
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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