Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I wasn't that drunk.
You were calling my cat 'Simba' and holding him up in the air.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
