She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
By the way, you totally deserve "i got a job sex".
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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