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OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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