I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I just googled if crying burns calories
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
Randomize
