I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
slept at my ex’s house last night and as i was leaving his brother was sitting there on the sofa and said “bet you regret that one don’t ya”
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
