just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
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You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
ugh... thank God for ATM withdrawal limits. I was drunk enough to give that weird shaped stripper all of my money while making her cry in the back room.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
And now I have fucked a local celebrity so double free drinks at bars.
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Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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