You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Sorry my hands just texted you
NoShamevember. You game?
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
