My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
It's like the god of all feather dusters, but for your vagina
It really is the softest mustache
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
Randomize
