Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
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