he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
