He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
