Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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