I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
I'm reducing my diet to vodka and rice cakes.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
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