Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
And the cops told us we were all naked.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
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