wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
She just came home holding a fire hydrant. Yes a fire hydrant.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Randomize